friendyousohard | 25th Spell: [Video]

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25th Spell: [Video]

You know, of all the Pokemon to honor, Slowpoke seems like a rather odd choice.

[If Twilight's voice sounds funny, it's because she's currently at the bottom of a well. And those familiar with Azalea town should probably be able to get clued in pretty quickly that it's Slowpoke Well, specifically.]

Not that I have anything against the species in general but... it's not a Legendary or anything, which is what these are usually named after. I guess it could just be because there are so many of them... though I haven't actually seen any yet.

[As she says that there's a squish sound, and the video wobbles when she jumps.]

Ah! Oh... There you are. [The view shifts to a Slowpoke, who seems entirely undisturbed by the fact that it just got stepped on.] Good, I'm glad you're here after all. Snails, come on out!

[One pop of a pokeball later, a Slowbro is standing there staring down at it's brethren. The two of them stare at one another for several moments before the Slowbro talks.

Sloooooooow

The Slowpoke stares in response for several more moments before answering with a Pooooooke of its own. Twilight groans.]

... Okay in retrospect I don't know why I thought this would need to be record- waugh!

[She jumps again, jiggling the camera, and the view turns to show several more Slowpokes coming towards her.]

Oh. Well, there really are a lot of them down here, aren't there? I guess Snails will have plenty of company for this little visit... Wait. They're coming from the direction of the stairs up, aren't they? Which means the path back is now all slimy and I'm liable to fall on my face...

[She and the camera swivel around back to Snails, who stares blankly at her, but with a big dopey grin on his face.]

You had them do that on purpose, didn't you?

[This seems like a really silly accusation at first...

Until he slowly, deliberately winks at her.]

You're not funny!

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Ha. He spend his time around ghost types?

[Bit of a joke there, but given the way certain ghosts seem to gravitate towards practical jokes, well...]

The only ghost I have is Robo, and he's the opposite of a prankster. More like... a would-be hero. So even if they are spending time together I can guarantee that's not where Snails gets it.

Great. So has he always been like that?

[Because... guh, if so, he's gotta wonder how she puts up with it. Then again, this is the doofus that put up with an equally tricky Haunter.]

Since he was a Slowpoke. He once tried to carry the gear into the bathroom while I was bathing so he could broadcast me naked to the network.

[Which would have been a pretty much unforgivable offense were he not a Pokemon.]

Thankfully Starswirl stopped him.

[...

Riku slaps his palm over his face and groans, trying not to envision this. There are some lines you just don't cross.]

Ugh, so he's a prankster and a pervert. Things just keep getting better and better.

[Only not. Augh, you have his utmost sympathy, Twilight. Truly.]

Yeah. The only reason I put up with him is because he's useful in battle and my others can usually keep him under control.

That and I honestly don't know if he's actually malicious or if he just doesn't get that other people don't share his sense of humor.

You ever thought about asking Starswirl about it? He's Psychic, so he could always probe his mind or something.

[Which is... kinda creepy to think about. Plus, Slowbros are psychic types, too, so...

Welp. Maybe that wasn't such a bright idea.]

Snails is a psychic type too and he's very defensively oriented. Starswirl might be able to overpower him and drag a few things out of his brain but honestly I don't know that's it's worth it to try. It'd probably just make him mad.

Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever seen him mad.

[Riku pauses and shuts his eyes trying to envision this. Slowpokes and Slowbros always have such goofy expressions. Is it even possible for them to get angry?

And yet...]

Maybe it's for the best. Don't know about you, but I'd hate to get on a psychic's bad side.

[For all they know, he could start pulling some weird mind melting attack.]

Especially a psychic with a pranking streak and a very confusing mind. One good thing is he never seems to repeat a joke, so it's not like I have to worry about him doing that again.

Or this. Though he's kind of showing his inspiration here. I didn't even have him out when I went through the ice path, how the hay could he have known about it?

[A rhetorical question, but one that might actually have an answer since Pokemon can be as prone to gossip as anyone.]

Maybe he's so powerful he can see right through his Pokéball...

[A sinister smirk starts to form along Riku's face, and he leans close to the camera.]

Who knows? Maybe your Slowbro's actually the essence of pure evil, and he's just waiting for the right moment to plunge the whole world into chaos.

[...Okay, that's taking it a bit far, but hey. This whole ordeal's left him in a somewhat silly mood.]

If that's the case, then it's a good thing I have him. I've beaten one spirit of chaos already, I'm fine taking on another.

[She is, of course, being utterly sarcastic, but her lips quirk up in a bit of a smirk.]

[Wait, what? Riku blinks, eyes widening, and he leans away from the screen.]

Okay, you can't say something like that and not give me any details.

I've never told you about Discord before? Huh.

[Ordinarily that's not the sort of thing that would surprise her, but something about her relationship with Riku makes it easy for her to believe that she'd have shared the story of a reality-warping God of Chaos with him already.]

Well it starts with ancient history. Not long after the founding of Equestria, a being called Discord appeared. He twisted reality around on his utterly insane whims, and quickly had all of Equestria under his control since, well... how do you fight something like that?

As it turns out there was an answer to that question. Princess Celestia and Princess Luna found the Elements of Harmony and used them to imprison Discord in stone. He stayed that way for over a thousand years, but the seal slowly weakened over time and about a year after me and my friends got together for the first time, he broke out.

[Hmm... Riku listens silently, tapping his fingers against a nearby nightstand. It sounds like something right out of a fairy tale. Or like a legendary Pokémon. Heh, maybe he's spent too much time in this place...]

Sheesh. And I bet he wasn't too happy about being cooped up.

[Riku'd probably be fuming in his shoes. After all, who wants to live the rest of their days as a hunk of rock?]

Nope. Though that didn't stop him from grinning like a jerk the whole way through. You know that smile that just screams "I'm up to no good"? He pretty much has no other expression.

[An exaggeration, but not much of one. Discord does love his shit-eating grins.]

Anyway, so since the girls and I were the bearers of the Elements now, we were the ones he went after. He lured us into a maze by suggesting the Elements were inside, but that was a trap. He just wanted to separate us so he could mess with our heads and change our personalities. It's impossible to describe how terrifyingly bizarre a cruel Fluttershy or a lying Applejack is without seeing it for yourself.

He could change your personalities.

[Just... what? Give him a second to process this. Even in a place like this, the idea's just plain bizarre. Maybe even a little scary.

A cruel Fluttershy...

He rubs his temple.]

So what about you?

[First thought: he sucked her intelligence dry, which is an equally scary thought.]

Sort of. Only in terms of him being able to reverse the traits that give us the ability to use the Elements.

[Which, given that those were incredibly important parts of each of them, was bad enough in and of itself.]

As for me, he didn't actually affect me directly... He didn't have to. Once all the others had been changed and we split up I just kind of... lost myself. I got so torn up that I just gave up, at least until Princess Celestia managed to get me back to normal by sending the reports I'd been sending to her all year on my friendship with the others back to me.

That snapped me out of it and I managed to use my magic to break his spell on the others. Once we were all together again we managed to re-seal him with the Elements.

[There's a brief pause as Riku tries to envision this. Twilight, giving up? But she always struck him as dedicated, hard working, and persistent. For her to crack like that... well, she did say that her friends got changed.]

Ha, so he's back to collecting moss, eh? Why doesn't anyone just smash the darn thing? That'd prevent any future escapes.

[When your best friends suddenly start fighting and sniping at you, it can take a pretty remarkable toll on your psyche.]

You know, I'm not entirely sure that's even possible. I mean, sure it looks like just stone, but it was made by powerful magic to seal a user of almost as powerful magic. It could very well be invulnerable.

Or smashing it could just let him loose again...

[Ugh, which would only bring them back to square one. Brilliant thinking on his part.]

He'd be better off trapped in a place like this. No powers means he'd be on the same level as everyone else.

That's also a possibility, yes.

As for him being brought here, I'm sure he'd find a way to be a nuisance anyway. Mind games are a favorite of his, and while it would be harder for him without his powers, I doubt it would be impossible.

Well, if he didn't end up in Team Rocket, at least he'd have to start small. If he did, well... Guess that's just one more obstacle for the rest of us.

But I mean, that's if he shows up. I'd say we're safe for now.

He probably would be a Rocket too. He's not much of a team player though, so he might end up causing them as much trouble as us.

And he might come from after he reformed...

Wait, reformed? But I thought he got turned back into a lawn ornament. Am I missing something here?

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